Mom

Mom
Mom

Art

Art
Art

Yoga

Yoga
Yoga

Me

Me
Me.....being grateful for every thing, every breath, every day of this life

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Awaken With Me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfxkFMKVAz8&feature=player_embedded

Deep Work


I am taking some time to be quiet.

Deep, deep inner-work is going on within my body's household. The dwelling of my body temple is in a shift. And I want to say that I am so grateful for it. I feel so many people, things and places guiding me and I have so much gratitude for it.

I had to express this. Right now, all I know and am soaking in is gratitude.

I am
resting
digging
healing
shedding
rejoicing
remembering
handling
following
caring
breathing
accepting
loving
receiving
appreciating
holding
feeling
forgiving
acknowledging
understanding
unlocking
moving
sitting
learning
exploring
shivering
trembling
realizing
moving
evolving
allowing
changing

Humbly, Bec

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Genes That Fit Perfectly

I am fitting into my new genes y'all!!! You know all those blah-gs I have written about weight loss??? Well, I am no longer needing to worry about my weight(just kidding those of you who are interested about that/care, I will never let go of writing about what WORKS in health and wellness)!!! Instead though for now, I am focusing on and turning my energy toward my genealogy. I have a new set of genes!!! And they fit like amazingly!!!!!

The work I have recently devoted my current 40 days to (if you are just tuning in, see the 3 posts below this one) seems to be working on a gene/DNA/cellular/neurological level. Now I realize that they say that this is what we are doing in the description and the soft wear I am currently using, but- I don't believe anything until I feel it, see it and know it for myself. Well, I'll be doggarned if it ain't workin' like magic. I cannot even describe to you....I feel like my body is actually changing from the inside out. From my core to my skin. From my brain to my muscles. From my organs to my chakras. Saddle up y'all, Becca is a whole new person....so far and I am currently only on about day 9 (or so) of my 40 day cattle drive.

So using "Installing Inner Game" I have been doing my research only after starting in on it...yeah, I do everything back asswards. So I am reading the blog dedicated to the soft wear,

http://blog.installinginnergame.com

and I am seeing that everything is happening just as it should, or as is normal for most people. That brings relief for sure. Some days when I do (I am just calling it a hypno-meditation of sorts for my own description) the meditation, I feel like I have just been baptized into a new, rejuvenating religion with Jesus by my side. And other days, I feel uncomfortable, irritable, cannot find a good position, my earphones won't sit right and keep getting in my way (you have to wear head phones to properly experience the guided recording), this that and the other. So I was so glad to see that this was normal here:

http://blog.installinginnergame.com/how-often-should-i-be-installing/

But then there is this shaking. I am not sure, the creator, Devon White, might have blogged about this at some point but I have not seen it yet. There, for me, is this jerking feeling. It is almost animal-like, like how you would see a dog or a duck shake water off of themselves, or how those animals would shake their entire skin after perhaps, getting into a squabble with another animal, then simply walk away and shake it off. That is the best way I can describe what it feels like! Ever since, oh day 5 or 6 I have been feeling this ever present feeling off all of my muscles firing at once. And when you listen to the meditation, it says, you will feel the work, the goodness, the cellular changes "pressing out into your muscles." I just cannot believe that it is actually working. I feel my very energetic makeup.........................................changing! Evolving. Improving. Healing. Strengthening. But best, BALANCING. All I ever intend on when I get or give Reiki is really for Balance. Sure, it is good to have intentions of peace, hapiness, good health, etc. But how do we sum all that up into one luscious word? I would say, balance. I am getting balance. Emotional balance. Physical balance. Nervous system balance, all systems from lymph to circulatory. How do I know? I can FEEL IT! And I cannot even believe it.

Now, I know I sound like a negative skeptic. And I have done stuff that HAS worked somewhat before, but it has never been sustainable. Why, one time, I straight-up felt like the Buddha, himself, finding enlightenment on a mountain top forest, when I was in an early-morning meditation one day during my Yoga certification. I was colors that were glowing! I was floating! I had reached God! But it never stuck with me. In fact, until this recent experience, I have had a hard time actually repeating practices on a daily basis EVER, my entire life, even (and especially) the things that I know have indeed worked well, like Yoga, Reiki, Meditation, anything! I have been on a spiritual journey for oh say, 13 years now. Ever since about the age of 18 when I felt completely dried up and completely empty of any spirit or direction whatsoever. And it has taken me this long, and I am still working, on finding true peace in my life. Health, wellness, happiness, you guessed it: balance. Perfect balance.

I think what Devon's soft wear, guided hypno-meditaion is doing here, with me is breaking my framework down...but then using that same wood and re-building the house of my body and my mind into a much more sturdy and clean dwelling. Together, my mind and body are working. Yoga (as an instructor and a student) for me, has (I will admit) been mostly a physical practice. I never thought so before, but I am sure seeing that now. Even my meditations have been really a physical band-aid, or physical sensation. I feel good and fluffy for an hour or two and then -bam! I go straight back to my molded, rotting foundation of a body and mind. Well my body temple is being rebuilt. Right now, one day at a time as I do this 40 day adventure to bliss I am actually re-birthing myself. Devon White and his research and recorded words are guiding me, but I made the choice to do the inner work, the mental work, the physical work and the energetic work and sit (well, lay, really) each day, at the same time and heal.

My favorite quote (of my own, toot toot):

'HEAL is the root word of Health. In order to obtain inner and outer perfect health, we must find out what needs to be healed within.'

Peace, HEALth and Balance y'all.
Love, Becca

(I am 1/4th the way through my journey now...stay tuned and come on back and check in!!!!!)

How Installing Inner Game Works

How Installing Inner Game Works


Holy Buh-jeezus this stuff works!!!! Next blog to come will be expressing my experience.....

Monday, July 12, 2010

Disgruntled Me

It is ok. That is what I am telling myself. My 40 day meditation journey just passed the week 1 mark. I am doing my own thing here, so I have no teacher directing me or telling me what to expect. But I have to believe the junk that I am feeling now must be normal for this kind of inner work.

I have had some discomforts and major sadness creep up on me, and I cannot even tell the source, it is just taking me over. But I am ok with it. I really do feel in my gut that it is junk from my past that I never dealt with, or ignored, or just the years of abuse to my body while ignoring ultimate health all coming up and (fingers crossed) moving on out.

I am sticking with it, but cannot believe I still have 32 more days of sitting through this information overload of a journey called "Inner Game." I loved it at first, not sure I fully feel the impact just yet. But I did commit myself to this experiment. I hope fruits of my meditations will peek through the darkness and discomfort. More to come.

If you are interested in learning more about Devon White's "Inner Game," they have changed the information site and download space, you can find it all here, it is VERY interesting to say the least:

Free download:
http://gogratitude.org/innergame

Devon's new site:
http://reality-bender.com

Peace and clarity y'all, more to come!